In therapy, we often turn toward the quieter things, what matters, what hurts, what steadies us, what pulls us forward. Values live in this gentle space. Our values aren’t rules or expectations, they’re more like the inner compass points that help you move through life in a way that feels true.

Most people come to therapy because something isn’t sitting right. They feel stuck, overwhelmed, disconnected, or unsure of their direction. Exploring values can bring a kind of clarity that isn’t about fixing yourself, but about understanding yourself.

This comes up more often than people think. And I’ll be honest, I’ve had times in my own therapy where I felt it too.

There were sessions where I walked out wondering what the point was. Times when I felt nothing had shifted. Weeks where the work felt uncomfortable, slow, or just… flat. I remember thinking, “Is this genuinely helping, or am I just talking in circles?” Other weeks felt raw, like something old had been stirred up, and I wasn’t sure why I’d willingly signed up for it.

We live in a world that loves shortcuts. We’re encouraged to optimise, streamline, “fix it fast.” There’s a tip for everything: better sleep, less anxiety, more confidence, stronger boundaries. And while there’s nothing wrong with small supportive practices, the idea that a quick hack can heal something deep, layered, and human is not only misleading, it’s dangerous.

Psychotherapists see the real cost of this culture. Clients arrive exhausted from trying to “self-improve” their way out of pain and deep rooted emotions. They’ve read the books, saved the Instagram posts, listened to the podcasts and watched the videos. They’ve tried grounding exercises, affirmations, and breathing techniques, but still feel anxious. And they quietly wonder, What’s wrong with me that these things aren’t enough?

If I could go back and speak to my younger self, I’d tell her that friendships change, that people grow, and sometimes they grow in different directions.

Growing up, I thought friendships needed to be forever. I held on tightly, even when something in me knew the connection was shifting. I didn’t yet understand that people grow at different rhythms, and sometimes the kindest thing we can do, for ourselves (and others) is to let those shifts happen without blame or shame.

There’s something about this time of year that stirs a mix of emotions. On the surface, Christmas looks like connection, celebration, lights and rituals. But beneath the surface, many women quietly begin to tense their shoulders and feel the heaviness this time of year brings. Not because they dislike Christmas, but because they know what’s coming and how much of it will land on them. And it’s rarely the big, dramatic tasks. It’s the thinking, the lists, the remembering, and the planning. The emotional labour of holding it all together so everyone else can have a “magical” time.

There’s a moment many clients have in therapy (sometimes early on, sometimes much later) when they realise that showing up to the room is only one part of the work. It’s an important part, yes. But doing therapy asks something a little deeper, a little braver, and often a little slower than we expect.

Have you ever felt surrounded by people, yet somehow still unseen? Like you’re speaking a language others don’t quite understand?

That quiet ache for connection is something many of us know well. It’s part of being human to want to feel known, accepted, and valued for who we truly are.

In therapy, I often hear people say things like “I don’t fit in” or “I can’t seem to find my people.” Beneath those words is a deep longing for belonging and connection. A desire to find a community where we can show up as ourselves without fear of judgment or rejection

For many people, taking that first step towards therapy can feel both brave and uncertain. You might wonder what to expect, what to say, or whether you’ll “do it right.” These worries are completely normal; most people feel a little nervous before their first session.

The truth is, your first therapy session isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about beginning a conversation.

When people first come to therapy, they often ask, “What kind of therapy do you do?” It’s a fair question given the many different therapeutic modalities and approaches.

As a pluralistic psychotherapist, I don’t follow just one approach. Instead, I draw from a range of evidence-based therapies to find what best supports you. Everyone is different and what helps one person might not help another, so I tailor the way we work to suit your individual needs, preferences, and goals.

Therapy is never one-size-fits-all. Different approaches help people in different ways depending on what you’re struggling with and how you like to explore things.

Here are a few common types explained simply…….

One of the most common questions people ask when they begin therapy is, “Why do I have to go every week?”

It’s a good question, and an important one. Therapy isn’t like a quick fix or a one-off chat. It’s more like learning a new language or strengthening a muscle. You need regular practice and consistency for it to take hold. Weekly sessions give the process space to breathe, deepen, and take root.

Many people think therapy is only for when life completely unravels, when things feel unbearable or there’s a clear “problem” to fix. But therapy isn’t only about crisis. It’s also about growth, reflection, and understanding yourself more deeply.

Many of us were never taught how to set healthy boundaries. We learned to keep the peace, to please others, or to put our own needs last.
But without boundaries, we often end up feeling resentful, exhausted, or invisible.